- One dozen bras* that no longer fit me, but are in good condition. Time are tough and the craigslist** "stuff for free" postings reach a lot of people who need free stuff. They went to a single mom who previously owned only one bra. Hands down, the best thing to come out of my recent weight gain.
- Craft supplies, given to a local nursing home, including 2 crewel embroidery kits and some 1970's vintage macrame cord. Although a few people are taking up macrame again, finding them is a challenge. You can buy macrame cord on eBay for very small amounts of money because it's so uncommon. So if you're looking for a cheap hobby, that may be the one. And yes, I thought of the nursing home because macrame is something done by people who were adults in the 70s (such as my mom, who would've probably thrown it out if I hadn't taken it) and well, not that I'm calling you old Mom, but, well, you are of retirement age and not everyone in your age group is as healthy as you are. The more you accuse me of calling you old, Mom, the more I'm gonna call you "spry", so it's on.****
- Partially used bottles of vitamins. Craigslist free stuff listings FTW.
- Party decorations from my parents' 30th wedding anniversary surprise party. Their 40th is this year and it's taken me all this time to realize that I have no need for a big banner that says "Happy 30th Anniversary". The "30!" candle was lit, but not long enough to actually melt at all. I've carried this stuff with me through 3 moves. Craigslist again.
* Until last year, I thought you had to wash a bra after only one wearing.*** After a discussion with my knitting group and asking the saleswoman who fitted me for my current batch of bras, I found out that you can wear them 3 times between washings as long as you alternate bras instead of wearing one for 3 days in a row. At the time, this felt like life-altering information.
** Unsurprisingly, I got an email from a guy who wanted my undies. I mentioned this to HA, who responded, "Well, not for free." Surprisingly, I only heard from one of those guys and not a multitude.*****
*** Therefore, I owned 2 weeks worth of bras because hand washing is a bitch. My cheap bra secret is buying them on eBay from someone who sells them on behalf of a homeless shelter. The company donates the bras and if there's no immediate need for that size, they sell the bra to support the shelter. Since there are no tags (since they were donated), the $30 bras go for about $10. But they're new, so it's not icky and I feel safe buying. If you're interested, e-mail me and I'll send you the name of the seller I use, but you can also just look for "New, No Tags" and then contact the seller to find out why there are no tags. That's what I did.
****Yes, my motherfucking parents read my blog now. I wonder how much profanity it would take to scare them away.
***** Considering how many mentions of underthings there are in this post, I suspect I'll be hearing from a lot more.