Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Chaos Demon

PriMaL Goddess KRING
Photo credit: shannonkringen
In my pre-parental days, I liked to say that having a kid was like bringing home a chaos demon. Nothing ever goes as planned, and takes ten times a long as it used to. Plus, they're all slime and antlers. (Buffy reference, for those of you who didn't get it.)

This pretty much is how things shook out with The Kid. 

In one of Douglas Adams' books (I seem to remember it being one of the Dirk Gently Books, but HA says it was the fourth Hitchhiker's Guide book - I think HA may be right--Karl please rule in the comments), there is an incidental character who is a truck driver and a rain god. The truck driver doesn't know he's a rain god. He only knows that he hates the rain because he's never had a day without it because the clouds follow him everywhere lovingly pouring rain on him.

I'm starting to wonder if The Kid is some sort of deity of Things Going Wrong. I mean, obviously, the system really let her down long before she ever came to us. But then I took her to a therapist who kept insisting that she was acting like a typical teenager (um, no) and would split the 45 minute weekly session between talking to me and to The Kid (separately). So The Kid got 20 minutes of therapy a week.

Plus, she never got all the services she was supposed to because her coordinator failed to coordinate. And let us not forget the ridiculousness that was enrolling her in school

When she left us, her school changed her parental contact info everywhere except in the Board of Ed's computer. So for months, we got robo-calls telling us that "our child" had missed school, or letting us know about the upcoming bus strike. I finally had to call the school myself to have that fixed.

The bus strike had to do with switching bus companies. Apparently, the switch happened. Because you know what the new bus driver did? Came to my house after school on Monday afternoon to drop off a child who wasn't even on the bus. The Kid doesn't even attend that school anymore. They actually called me to tell me that the bus was downstairs with S. When I explained, quite loudly, that S was most certainly not on that bus and she doesn't live here anymore and doesn't even go to that school anymore, they apologized, saying that it was a new driver and attendant. 

I don't how that explains them trying to drop off a child who wasn't actually on the bus. Or why this all happened at drop off, but not at morning pick up.

But seriously, I'm really starting to think this child is the Goddess of Chaos, and little Minions of Chaos follow her around adoringly, making sure that everything associated with her goes ker-flooey. 

It's really the only logical explanation.

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