I didn't buy them for myself, not even for the purposes of blog photography because I already own enough shoes that I don't wear. And I will not be wearing rubber shoes. No matter how comfortable Mario Batali says they are.
I came damn near close to buying a giant flower made of purple zebra print fabric because where else but in a dollar store are you going to find such a thing? Then I realized that if I bought it, I'd be finding it in my house, and just...no.
Also, I've developed a strong aversion to animal prints because The Kid loved animal print everything as an extension of her love of animals. Even though animal prints are a stand in for animal pelts, which are not generally worn by animal lovers. Add the skinny jean trend, and the child was trying to dress like a retired dealer in Reno.
I decided that if I'm going to keep doing the dollar store accessories thing, I'm going to have to stick to things I'd actually be caught dead wearing. And a giant flower made of purple zebra print fabric? You'd have to pose that with my corpse. And even then, I might rise up from the dead to get that thing away from me.
The little purple hat, I've worn outdoors twice already. And then I put it with the rest of my accessories, so I may never wear it again. It's really hard for me to remember to accessorize before leaving the house. It's probably a workflow issue, though I feel like if I had a big makeup table with a mirror and chair, I'd never leave the house looking less than fabulous again.
I did find some awesome little plaid hair clips. Suitable for the kindergarten punk rock princess, I guess. If nothing else, they'll help me overcome the aversion to plaid I developed while attending Catholic grammar school. Our uniform plaid was gray, green, black, and yellow. It was so ugly that ancient Scottish warriors clad in nothing but their clan tartan and blue face paint returning from battle would've stopped and said, "Damn, girl, that is one ugly plaid."
Here's me in one clip of each color:
Then I decided to get a little artistic.
Then I decided to arrange them like a flower, because that's a perfect look for a forty-one year old woman.
Thoughts? Suggestions? I might actually get up the nerve to take pictures inside a store that isn't so close to my house, so if you're in NYC, suggest your fave dollar store and maybe I can check it out.